Sorry, I’m trying to wrap my head around the concept of stale candy corn. Like, how could you even tell? Recommended listening: Just amusing myself, here.

…and thus ended the short-lived feud between the Pussycats and the Groovie Goolies. Recommended listening: It’s Spooky Season appropriate because, let’s face it, you are utterly horrified I posted it here.

Before Eustace Q. Sadism, EdD hit upon the venture which would make him a household name, he’d tried his hand at a staggering number of enterprises which never caught on with the public. Here are a few: – The Yarn Store of Dr. Sadism – The Slot Car Emporium of Dr. Sadism – The Wicker […]

  (from “The Second Death of the Spectre” in Adventure Comics #440, July-August 1975; by Michael Fleisher and Jim Aparo) Testing… Testing… Is this thing still on? Sigh. If nothing else, the thick veneer of dust and curtains of cobwebs which have accumulated in Armagideon Time HQ will add to the ambience of my foolhardy […]

A decaying relic, kept in a mockery of life by foul alchemy and a perpetual state of rage born of ancient esoteric grudges? Oh, he’ll do just fine in these parts. Recommended listening: More regional ghosts.

(excerpts from Van Nielsen’s Field Notes on Prime-Time Draculas) Rollin Handula: Master of disguise, strong affinity towards the moon. Daughter also a vampire of minor reknown. Won an Oscar for his poignant portrayal of another elderly ailing Dracula. Swanula: Do not be fooled by the diminutive stature!!! Has made multiple demonic pacts with terrifying entities […]

“The Nice Price” was a late 1970s branding initiative by CBS Records, where perennial backcatalog faves got badged and repriced as midbudget offerings. Nearly all of my old Clash tapes and CDs sported the sticker when I bought them. The copy of Combat Rock that Maura scored for me somewhere still has its one on […]

Poor misbegotten creature. He only crawled out of his lair to catch a Guided By Voices show and maybe hit up that new barcade down the block for some craft brews and Ms. Pac-Man. Little did he realize that he would be attacked by a mob who thought Monster was the best R.E.M. album, and […]

AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *hic* AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ARF! Recommended listening: You were expecting that Warren Zevon track, right? Sorry.

“Y’know, kids, the blood is the life…and it shall be mine!” Recommended listening: