{"id":16426,"date":"2022-10-29T15:45:01","date_gmt":"2022-10-29T19:45:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/?p=16426"},"modified":"2022-10-29T15:45:50","modified_gmt":"2022-10-29T19:45:50","slug":"halloween-countdown-day-29-legs-are-coming","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/?p=16426","title":{"rendered":"Halloween Countdown: Day 29 \u2013 Legs are coming"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><center><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/img\/221029\/1029a.jpg\" width=\"590\" height=\"427\" title=\"Big spiders neeeeeeeeed a riiiiiiiide....\" class=\"alignnone size-full\" \/><\/center><\/p>\n<p>GIANT SPIDERS! They like to interfere with road crews for kicks!<\/p>\n<p><center><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/img\/221029\/1029b.jpg\" width=\"590\" height=\"330\" title=\"Giant spiders in park must be leashed.\" class=\"alignnone size-full\" \/><\/center><\/p>\n<p>GIANT SPIDERS! They like to picnic in the grass!<\/p>\n<p><center><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/img\/221029\/1029c.jpg\" width=\"590\" height=\"325\" title=\"Fucking eight-legged hipsters coming in and gentrifying formerly worker bee neighborhoods.\" class=\"alignnone size-full\" \/><\/center><\/p>\n<p>GIANT SPIDERS! Always looking for a good deal on a firm but comfortable queen-size mattress!<\/p>\n<p><center><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/img\/221029\/1029d.jpg\" width=\"590\" height=\"316\" title=\"Sorry, babe, if I knew you were stopping by, I'd have picked up the place a little.\" class=\"alignnone size-full\" \/><\/center><\/p>\n<p>GIANT SPIDERS! They greatly overestimate their abilities as pick-up artists!<\/p>\n<p><center><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/img\/221029\/1029f.jpg\" width=\"590\" height=\"316\" title=\"With that many armpits, it's even more important to use a good deodorant.\" class=\"alignnone size-full\" \/><\/center><\/p>\n<p>GIANT SPIDERS! Sometimes they are powered by a rear-mounted 1600 cc engine with twin-port cylinder heads!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Recommended listening:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><center><iframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/zOjxuhCH01Q\" title=\"YouTube video player\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/center><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>GIANT SPIDERS! They like to interfere with road crews for kicks! GIANT SPIDERS! They like to picnic in the grass! GIANT SPIDERS! Always looking for a good deal on a firm but comfortable queen-size mattress! GIANT SPIDERS! They greatly overestimate their abilities as pick-up artists! GIANT SPIDERS! Sometimes they are powered by a rear-mounted 1600 [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[198,668,15],"tags":[19,1773,33,396],"class_list":["post-16426","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-animals","category-halloween-countdown","category-music","tag-bad-science","tag-god-damn-spiders-ruining-this-country","tag-idiocy","tag-my-favorite-things"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16426","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=16426"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16426\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16428,"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16426\/revisions\/16428"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=16426"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=16426"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/armagideon-time.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=16426"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}