Armagideon Time

Uff doi

November 13th, 2013

In olden times, this wild Norsemen sailed the seas in search of treasure, more about slaves, discount and a means to mitigate their chronic overpopulation problem through wanton bloodshed and conquest.

These days, sedentary sad sacks with low sales resistance can commemorate those wild times with a seventy dollar (shipping and handling extra) dust collector which bears no resemblance to the Vikings of yore!

Each statue also comes with an exclusive wergild warranty. Should any harm or damage come to your statue by another party, the policy entitles you to recompense in the form of two adult pigs or a modestly attractive female thrall of no less than thirty summers.

Actually, most vikings chose to have images of pimple-faced 1970s stoners airbrushed onto their bitchin’ custom cloak conversions.

2 Responses to “Uff doi”

  1. Prankster

    “Thus did the brave Norsemen venture out in their tiny, tiny ships which sank immediately due to the absence of half the hull…”

  2. damanoid

    Caution: not all collectible figurines increase in Valhalla.

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